So what about your front yard? Well my wife and I had been seeing a hen recently with 8-10 poults. Usually we saw them on the driveway, but upon closer inspection I discovered that they were also dusting in my jalapeno plants! So I went down to the creek and pulled the feeder I had up this spring (the one that gave me these shots) and moved it to my own front yard.

I didn’t see any turkeys for a few days but there was some suspicious sign. After a week I set up a camera to see what was coming by:

As you might imagine, it wasn’t taking long for the feeder to get cleaned out. Experience has taught me that once the deer find a turkey bucket you’re going to have a hard time in that spot. They learn that they can head-butt the bucket and then eat what falls out. A few of them will get in the pattern of hitting it at night and by morning the bucket is empty. Obviously the deer (and coons) had found me, so I tried to switch over to cracked corn hoping the deer would be less interested. Nope. In the past 2 weeks they’ve cleaned me out of 100 lbs of cracked corn. The turkeys were still coming in every day but I was going broke… So now for the past few days I’ve taken to throwing out about 4 cups of cracked corn each night when I feed the dogs. So far the deer seem to think picking through my yard for cracked corn is a waste of time… but we’ll see…

Anyone have any experience on this? Ideas?

Well, doing elk is the exact same except for two small adjustments:
1) Use a bigger tub
2) After a week or so remember to pull the ivories

They should look like these two from the 2010 season:

For a more detailed breakdown of why I like the cold water method and how to do the other methods, click here.

First, you need to clean the deer. Cut the head off and cape it out. For whitetails you need to get rid of the lower jaw, tongue and throat area tissue. Also remove the eyes and any extra muscle tissue you can find. All of this needs to be done around the time you kill the deer unless you want to deal with a disgusting mess at some later date. Once the hide and large chunks of meat are gone you can decide what you want to do next.

Boiling:

Boiling is a stinky mess. I’m not sure if I’ll do it again. Basically you need some type of big metal pot and a way to boil water in it. We use a stainless steel pot like the ones you fry turkeys in and a propane burner. Then you boil the head for quite a while until the remaining tissue is soft. Then we blast it with a power sprayer. Then you need to blast yourself with a power sprayer. HINT: Wear a full set of raingear when you start spraying.
Advantages: The mount can be displayed within days of being killed.
Disadvantages: It’s a god awful mess. It also damages the softer bones around the nose and makes the teeth fall out. You can glue the teeth back in.

Beatles:
I’ve never done my own beetles, but I’ve sent trophies out. It doesn’t really count as DIY but I included it here so you know what your options are.
Advantages: Someone else deals with the mess. The bugs are allegedly the least damaging to soft bones around the nose.
Disadvantages: It costs more than any other option. It will take a while.

Fire ants and Other Natural Bugs:
I have only one experience with this as well. The Old Man brought back a hog skull that a friend from Texas had done this way. As I understand it, you simply bury the skull in a fire ant hill and they eat the flesh off. Be careful to bury it so that critters won’t dig it up and carry it off.
Advantages: It seems pretty easy, and cheap.
Disadvantages: The skull I dealt with had a reddish stain to it. Obviously not everyone has fire ants to use. It’s also very slow.

Cold Water Maceration:
This is my favorite, and the way I did the skulls picture above. It’s a simple matter of putting the heads into water and waiting for the process of decay to take its course. In Kansas it is too cold for anything good to happen until mid-April so I wait until then to put them in water. When I first started I would put them in water right away and then worry about what damage freezing would do. Now I just store them until it warms up. I use a 35 gallon Rubbermaid trashcan and just add enough water to cover the bone. Early in the process I will change the water every two weeks or so to keep the smell down. I also think the slight agitation from adding new water helps. Sunday I checked on our bear skulls that had been in water longer than the deer above. They had not had the water changed in two months and were noticeably behind schedule. The warmer the weather, the faster it works. After maybe 6-8 weeks the majority of the tissue will be gone and you can speed up the process by periodically using a toothbrush on the remaining areas of concern. When the skulls can sit in the bucket for a week and the water is still clear, they are done. Take them out and give them a couple of days in the sun. They should turn out very white:

Advantages: Besides the cost of a trashcan, it’s free. It is gentle on the soft bones. It is also very easy. That’s why I do it.
Disadvantages: It takes a couple of months at least. It also can smell moderately bad in the early stages. If you live in a small neighborhood you would need to pour the water off regularly. A friend recently had his dog get into the putrid water… bad news.

I’ve done the cold water method on small game and hogs as well. The teeth will fall out on a hog, so keep it in a separate smaller bucket so you can be sure not to lose them when you change the water. They are easy to glue back in when you are done, just don’t lose them. A good hog skull will not fit in a 5 gallon bucket so you’ll need something slightly larger.

When I first looked into doing this I heard that if the water stayed on the horns they would change color. That has not been my experience, so you don’t need to worry about an exact water level.

Now all you need is a plaque or a nail and you’re good to go. It’s an easy way to save your skulls without taking up too much wall space. Let me know how it works for you…

First, we start with a dirty but otherwise healthy Browning BPS:


The first steps should be easy for anyone with any experience at all. Take the sling off, and then take off the barrel by unscrewing the magazine cap. Set them aside, we’ll get there.

Next find the pins above the trigger on the receiver:

Now you have two choices. If you knock both pins out you can remove everything. Or you can leave the smaller (or more dorsal pin) in. It holds the ejector in place and really isn’t especially critical to your cleaning mission. It’s really up to you but for today’s exercise I’ve removed them both.

Pull everything out and it should look like this:

So now you can wipe everything down and blow out the powder junk. I generally leave a very light coat of oil on the parts but I don’t know that it matters. I suspect you could coat the parts in tar and the BPS would still function flawlessly. I do suggest using some type of compressed air to clear the junk from the springs in the trigger. Once everything is clean it’s time to reassemble, the tough part.

Put the ejector in with the tips aimed down, or dorsal. Then drop the bolt in with the face forward and the round part down. Put the second half of the bolt, the square piece, with the smooth part facing you, or ventrally and the prongs pointing towards the stock. It should look like this with the ejector and bolt:

And then with the second piece of the bolt:

If you are having a hard time getting the second piece to sit right fiddle with the forearm. The notches in the forearm bars slide into the gaps of the square piece of the bolt. The square piece also slides forward and backwards along grooves in the receiver. It’s not hard to make it work. Once you’ve got that done slide the bolt forward so you can get your fingers on the ejector.

About now you’re regretting that you took out the second pin. It needs to go back in, and it has a sleeve that is loose. There is no great secret to this part. Line the pin up with the whole in the ejector and tap it in enough to hold the ejector. Then with your index finger try and curl the sleeve up under the ejector and hold it there while you tap the pin into place. It takes some practice but it’s not hard to understand.

Next you’re going to put the magazine catch rods (I’m making up the names for all these parts, “magazine catch rods” could legitimately be called, “those fucking things that never go back right”) back in:

They go along the edge of the receiver towards the upper end and up against the magazine tube. The notches face up or ventrally and they should bend into the middle like so:

The secret to the whole thing is right here: You must get these rods lined up equally with each other and all the way forward, up against the magazine. If one is even slightly farther forward or backward you’re screwed. They will try to fall out, fall out of alignment, and anything else they can think of to screw the whole thing up. They will conspire against you. Eventually, perhaps by blind luck, you’ll get them lined up right. Now slide the trigger into the grooves in the receiver. If it doesn’t go, check to make sure the half-moon shaped pins are lined up correctly (horizontally rather than vertically).

If all is well with your magazine catch rods your trigger will simply slide into place. If it does not slide on the first try (it rarely does) you need to line those rods up better and make sure the bolt release lever is out of the way (it works its way out and hits the edge of the receiver). This can be extremely frustrating. There were years when I had to walk away from it and come back with a fresh mind and a new reserve of patience. As I got better it became easier. It will always go eventually, but sometimes I’ve resorted to light tapping with the tack hammer. Today it slid right into place…

Put the remaining pin in, it will go easily.

Finally, don’t forget to clean the inside of the barrel and lightly oil the sling swivels. I use a bore snake product but I’m not sure it matters:

Let the hammer down, lightly wipe down the outside metal, and you’re ready for the safe.

Now the post-season depression is full blown…

1) Get some doves and a pair of game shears:

2) Cut the wings off at the base (closest to the body):

3) Place the dove in your palm with the breast up and the head away from you. Find the soft spot underneath the breast and stick your thumb in:

4) Pull the breast free from the guts, head, shoulders and everything else:

5) Peel the skin off the breast portion:

6) When you’re done it should look like this:

Some alternatives? You can break the wing bones with your fingers if you don’t have game shears. It’s a good way to get a bone jammed through your thumb though. You can also skip straight to pulling the breast off (with the wings still on) and make one cut, like so:


The advantage of this method is speed, the disadvantage is that I think you lose some of the meat on the front of the breast. It’s hard to see exactly where to make the cut so you end up cutting some of the meat off. I’m also not sure it’s really faster.

Thoughts? Questions? Doves are one of my favorite wild game to eat. Enjoy!

Since goose has a heavy, greasy flavor and we cut the meat thick, we’re going to need a strong marinade. In this situation I use my “Jalapeno” recipe.

4 cups Soy Sauce
4 cups Worcestershire
1 Table Spoon Garlic Powder
1 TS Onion Powder
2 TS Coarse Black Pepper
5 TS of Jalapeño Powder

The jalapeño powder is obviously the secret to this flavor. With 4 T you’ll get a good flavor but it won’t be very hot. With 6 it will be hotter than some will like. I grow the peppers in my garden and dehydrate them myself. Once I have enough dried I’ll obliterate them in the food processor until I’m left with a very fine powder that is positively toxic. You may want to wear latex gloves and goggles when you’re dealing with it. You could use hot sauce or red pepper flakes if you don’t want to mess with whole peppers but the flavor makes it worth the work.

Put everything in some type of shakable container and mix it up real good then pour some in a Ziploc and add the meat. Make sure you mix and shake the bag so that all the meat is separated and coated.

I usually let it sit at least 24 hours but I’m not sure it makes any difference. I suspect as long as the meat was fully coated you could skip the waiting and still end up with good flavor.

After marinating you’re ready to start drying. My drying has evolved from a couple of terrible ideas. The first time I made jerky I used toothpicks and suspended the strips of meat from racks in my oven. It was time consuming, it made the whole house stink, and it was messy. I found that tactic on the internet somewhere but after one try it was clear I needed a new plan. Next I used an oven rack like so:

It was also messy, slow, and smelly. Part of the problem is that with these racks you can’t drop the temp low enough to keep from partially baking the meat.

Now I use this thing:

There is no contest, you need one of these. It’s faster, cleaner, and handles larger batches than any of the oven methods. It came with 4 but 6 racks makes a full gallon sized batch. You can add up to 20 racks, or so I’m told. It also produces a better product because you can control a lower temp. For today’s run we’re using 125 degrees for 5 hours. I’ll do about 3 hours one day, put the racks in the fridge over night, and do 2 hours the next day. I think it allows the moisture in the middle of the thicker pieces to spread out and get a more even level of drying. With thinner cuts 120 for 4 hours is standard.

When you’re done I put the jerky in the freezer for storage. I’ve never tested it to see how long it will last at room temp but I once sent two batches to Iraq and it arrived in good shape.

A few final tips:
- With heavy marinades (like those with tomato paste) it will take longer, sometime a lot longer.
- With sugary marinades either add oil or spray the racks with pam.
- With acidic marinades (like pineapple juice) don’t leave it soaking too long or the meat will get mushy.
- The type of pepper you add to pizza has a good flavor and sticks to the meat well. It can be substituted for black or red pepper.
- Write the recipe on the bag you store the jerky in.
- Don’t underestimate the effect the weather has on the drying time. Dry winter air is much faster than humid summer air.

But here’s my take on the subject: If you aren’t short on meat, make jerky out of the lesser quality stuff. If you have elk or caribou cut them into steaks and save the whitetail for jerky. Pick a big batch of teal and breast out the geese. You get the idea…

Now how to make that jerky?

First you’ll need the meat. Today we’re using goose breasts.

Make sure you wash the breast well then cut off the fat and connective tissue. If you breasted the goose well you’ll also want to remove the smaller piece of meat underneath because it has a tendon running through the middle of it. You can use that meat but you’ll need to cut that tendon free.

Don’t forget to check for shot. Generally I make a small cut across any pellet hole I see and then check to see if it came out the other side. You don’t want steel in your jerky and you really don’t want it in your electric meat cutter.

For me a full batch is a fairly full 1 gallon Ziploc of finished jerky. To accomplish that amount you’ll need about 5 larger goose breasts all cleaned up. Since breasts usually come in even numbers you’re probably looking for either 2 or 3 birds.

Next you’re going to have to cut the meat up. To make that job easier make sure you dry the breasts well and then put them in the freezer for about 30 minutes or until they are lightly frozen. It makes the meat easier to get consistent and clean cuts with.

Once frozen you’ll be ready to cut. If you want thicker jerky you’ll probably want to cut the meat by hand with a sharp knife. The thicker jerky works better with the more mild forms of meat like antelope and venison. It doesn’t work as well with goose because the flavor is strong and not particularly good. For today’s examination we’re cutting goose medium thick with a knife.

With a cut this thick we’re going to use a strong marinade to cover the natural stank. We’ll discuss marinade tomorrow. If you’re using mild meat or sweet flavoring you can use an electric slicer. It’s much faster, but it doesn’t give very consistent cuts at the thicker settings.

Tomorrow we’ll talk marinades and drying…

Get some jalapenos, cut them in half, and clean out the seeds.

Fill the jalapenos with cream cheese.

Put a breast on each side of the pepper and wrap it in bacon. Use toothpicks to hold everything together.

And then you’re ready for the grill. You don’t want to get it too hot. I like to brown them on each side then put them around the edge of the grill and put the lid on. You don’t want to over cook.

Now you’re good to go.