Little Red Riding Hood is skipping thru the forest road when she sees the big bad wolf crouched down behind a log. ‘ My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf.’

The wolf jumps up and runs away.

Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched behind a bush. ‘My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf.’

Again the wolf jumps up and runs away. About 1/4 mile down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched down behind a rock. ‘My what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf.’

With that the wolf jumps up and screams, ‘Will you knock it off, I’m trying to poop!’

weather in maine has gotten better if you hate winter.

the snow deck has gone in western maine

I.m going to rake my lawn

the under snow people have left there old christmas tree and the wreath.

the sand they left under the snow bank

the broken branches from the birch.

I am always amased at how much stuff those little people can spread around my yard in 4 short months

If im lucky I can get the raking done befor the black flys get to bad.

thats a whole nother story.

When the big bosses requested today the ever important road kill report.

The details of car crashes with unfortunate deer.

I sent out a quick email

you know sometimes they need this type info rite now.

Well it goes like this from 01/01/2008-03/31/08

On rt. 117 Buckfield two deer dead.

On 117 So. Paris two deer dead.

On 117 Norway one deer dead.

I also let them know that if I was a deer I would want to live on rt 219 Greenwood City

Nokills—— Better drivers or smarter DEER.

ps. last summer the state asked for GPS. of all road kill critters they could get.

(Truth)

years ago the states of Maine and Newhampshire had a survey done to define the line between the two.

Up above Grafton Notch in the Upton area.

They found that an old hermit who had lived his whole life In the New Hampshire woods

Was actualy living in Maine.

When asked by a national news reporter what he thought about becoming a maine native after all those years?

He said Thank God.

I don’t think I could have lived threw another New Hampshire winter.

Three older americans had driven to town and where having a lunch.

They talked of there health problems and what they where dealing with.

Stuff That they didn’t have to years ago.

One old guy said while holding his hand up.

I can barely see my own hand in front of my face.

Thats tough!

You know I use to be able to hold my arms out in front of me with ease said the second fella.

Then the old gal chimed in.

I have some trouble lifting my feet up while sitting.

Then came the old timer pause.

The comment after was one for the books.

THANK GOD WE STILL HAVE OUR DRIVERS LICENCES.

Today it was cold as a well diggers ars in the klondike here.

We at dot thought the Pats did ok sunday but we want the old brady back.

he looked tired.

We would like to see John Mcains grand ma show Chuck Norris whats what.

I wonder what flavor soap he likes ? would hope they get it on film.

Put some round glasses on him and use it for a spoof of a christmas story.

Us older people need to stick togather.

Where not All movie stars.

Good thing because someone mite have to listen to us and here what we think.

years back the locals would sit in the local store talking of there new snow sleds.

Get all giddie with the mention of snow coming soon.

They would bragg of last years big rides who had the best sled.

As winter came and fizzel out.

They got only one small ride with the lack of snow.

One rainey spring day the boys all sat in the local store talking of the lack of winter.

They turned to teasing rat an old fella who got only one ride on his new sled.

They said rat what you going to do with that new sled now.

Rat replied we didn’t get much snow this winter.

If I thought it would keep the snow away next year.

I’d order another new sled next season.

(truth)

One day a pothole complaint came in by phone

The mechnic took the call he told the caller an uptight old gal from the better side of town that he would tell the boss.

Two or three days later he got the same call from the same gal she was less than nice on the phone

He told her that he would tell the boss.

two or three days later the phone rang and low and behold it was the pothole gal and she was not at all interested in small talk.

she went off on the mechnic for all she was worth and let him know that someone was going to fix that pothole today or there was going to be big trouble.

He waited a second and answered with

mam if you would go out and put that pothole in the trunk of your car and drive it down to the garage I will fix it

like I told you the first time you called i’m just a mechnic and i’ll tell the boss.

(truth)

DOT The way life should be.

Today I went to Waterford to talk with a lady who loves the deer.

She asked if the DOT could move the deer crossing signs to a safer place for the deer to cross.

They seem to get hit while crossing in that corner she said.

(truth)